What not to cook - part 2

I'm not sure how to explain this recipe. Maybe Halloween brought out my inner mad scientist, but these loaves turned out to be evil on several levels. Unpleasantly dense, with a stodgy texture of dampened sawdust and (best of all!) no discernable flavour. As far as Halloween goodies go, these land firmly in the "trick" category.

Here's how it played out. You know how sometimes you have a lot of odds and ends in your pantry or fridge that you want to use, and you end up making a soup or pasta sauce out of whatever you have on hand? Well today I decided to try that, but with the goal of turning the mismatched set of ingredients into baked goods. This meant having to improvise some kind of recipe. Oh, and I wanted to come up with a completely vegan recipe, so it couldn't include any eggs.

What could go wrong?

Frankenloaf

Preheat oven to 350.

Dry ingredients:
6 packets instant oatmeal (apples and spice)
1 c bran
1 c whole grain flour
1 c unbleached organic flour
2 tbsp wheat germ
2 1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
2 tsp Chinese 5-spice
1/4 tsp cinnamon

Combine all dry ingredients in bowl; set aside.

Wet ingredients:
2 tbsp flax seeds, powdered in spice mill
6 tbsp cold water
1 banana, mashed
2 apples, quartered
1 carrot, quartered
1/2 c agave nectar
1/2 c canola oil
1 c almond milk

Mix flax seed powder with cold water and set aside until a viscous mixture forms. Place the apples and carrot in a food processor, and process until they form a wet pulp. (Mmm - "viscous", "wet pulp"... hungry yet?) Add to mashed banana. Stir in the agave nectar, oil, almond milk, and flax seed mixture.

Add the wet ingredients to the dry, and stir to combine. Scoop mixture into greased mini loaf pans, and bake for 45 min. Let cool slightly before discarding.